Thursday, November 27, 2008

ABC’s of Thanksgiving.

Here is a list of things I am thankful for this year.

A - Ant killer. Yes, I am thankful for ant killer. (oh yeah--and Ava.)
B - Becky--the best sister and aunt in the world.
C - Coach Purses!!
D - Diet Dr. Pepper - Because without that I would be a serious "B" in the mornings. And afternoons.
E - my employees. The most loyal group I have ever had.
F - Family - I am thankful they put up with me.
G - Grandma--The one woman I wish I could be more like.
H - Hippo. That little pink stuffed animal purchased at a Grand Canyon gift shop was the best purchase my parents ever made.
I - internet--Without the internet I would never talk to my friends--old and new.
J - John. Goes without saying.
K - my KitchenAid mixer.
L - Laura--she forces me to be thankful and she doesnt even know it.
M - Mom and Dad -if we can be half the parents they are, I am doing good.
N - Norman, as in Susan best friend.
O - Opportunity - The opportunity to start a new job next week.
P - Primrose- The best school ever.
Q - Quick Trip--best gas prices in town.
R - Rock Paper Scissors--the way we solve disputes at our house.
S - Sonic--like you didn't expect that.
T - toll tag--keeps me out of traffic and keeps you from being the subject of my road rage.
U - Upbringing--because after the things I have seen the last few weeks, I realize my parents raised me well.
V - Vacation - I LOVE traveling with my husband. And I can afford to do so.
W - Wii--brings my competitiveness to a whole new level.
X - I am thankful I have not had any xrays this year.
Y - year-end--2008 SUCKED.
Z - Zoo - Fun times with Ava!

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Tuesdays Quote

In any moment of decision... the best thing you can do is the RIGHT thing, the next best thing is the WRONG thing, and the Worst thing you can do is NOTHING.
-Theodore Roosevelt

Monday, November 24, 2008

A gift to myself.

After all of this nonsense I deserve to feed my guilty pleasure. And since I have been offered a job I am going to be sporting a new Coach purse from the Zoe collection.

I'll wait until after Christmas to see if I need to buy myself the previously blogged about Kindle.

Another day, a day closer to leaving...

So today I had the priveledge (HAHA) of breaking up a punch fest between 2 grown women fighting over a duvet. One started by pushing the other, the other punched in the shoulder, I told them both to get a life and get the hell out of my store. I told them if either touched the other on the way out or in the parking lot I would detain them (like I could do that) and press charges. I don't know if they left so willingly because they knew I was serious, or because I was yelling at them like an evil stepmother, or because they could see I was at my wit's end and I was just over it.

Funny thing is, if the dumb women would have looked at the bottom shelf they would have found more of the same duvet they were fighting over.

Then later I had another grown woman KICK ME IN THE SHIN because she didn't have a receipt to prove proof of purchase. When she kicked me I just laughed...because SERIOUSLY...REALLY...I told her my 4 year old doesn't kick and scream like that when she doesn't get her way. Another guest had words with the kicker and that made the kicker angry and she left.

Just another day in hell.

Sunday, November 23, 2008


Don't you just love those new moms with fresh pink little babies who think they know EVERYTHING about how to raise a newborn? You know...that 20 something mom with all the newest, trendiest gadgets..all supposed to be the best for this little baby. The one who INSISTS to any warm body that is listening that diposable diapers are evil and cloth diapers are going to keep the ice caps from melting..(just joking..she didnt say that.) The new mom who insists that the latest blogger on her blog roll has more advice to give than her own mom and grandmother.

Meet my latest idiot "guest" yesterday. She had a newborn (3 days young) out in the 45 degree cold winds. This little baby was super cute all dressed in pink and brown, with a GIGANTIC pink bow the size of my head attached to her head, curled up all nice in her carseat. The mom of this cute little thing was one of those cute little things herself, in her designer jeans that were no bigger than a size 4 and her Louis Vutton purse the size of a volkswagon beattle. You know..the ones we all love to hate but secretly envy... She wore this really beautiful white coat as well, really nice...

Anyways, the mother and grandmother of the new mom were pushing the cart through hell (LNT as you know it) as the new mom was barking orders about how to push the cart with baby Maddie sitting inside. The cart was one of those annoying carts with a wheel that does its own thing, so I told the new mom I would go get another cart for her. This 20 something splinter of a girl thanked me and called me HONEY when I gave her the new cart. (Insert an UGHHH... and also a eye roll..)

Before I tell you any more, let me tell you that I was 5 days away from turning 30 years old when I had Ava. I was around little kids and babies my entire life. I practically raised Becky when she was a baby because I wouldn't put her down. So my mom says. But when I brought my own child home, I was hopeless. My mom stayed with me the first week Ava was home and my mom has been on call since then. So..I am NOT saying I am God's gift to mothers. No way...maybe my mom is...but not me...

Anyways, this new mom is having a very heated conversation with her maternal family members about what type of towel is best suited for little Maddie. Does Maddie need Egyptian cotton yarn with longer loops for silky rich texture, or the pure hand picked cotton that has extra long generous terry loops for faster drying? Or should we go with the celebrity towel that is made with Pima cotton? OH...such deliberation on towels... I was asked for my opinion...I spoke to the maternal grandparents when I answered. I told them the Rachel Ray towels were IMO overpriced and the colors were appauling... my preference is the Genesis...but if we are buying new towels for a newborn...just go with this everyday oxford ultra that is soft and absorbant and will withstand tough wear. I told them that I bought Ava oxford towels to use in her bathroom and I have all different kinds of towels in my bathroom. The new mom was insulted that I thought she would buy her precious Maddie cheap towels. She dismissed me. ("You're dismissed." is actually what she said.) I told her to buy whatever she wanted for the baby. It didnt make me any difference.

But before I walked away, I had to tell this new mom who knew everything that old moms and new moms like myself might question where her head is when she is fighting over towels, but has her 3 day old child out in 45 degree cold and wind with no socks, no shoes, no hat, NO BLANKET, BUT in a super cute sleeveless princess onsie with a pink and brown tutu. YES...that is what precious Maddie was wearing yesterday. Mom has on a beautiful white coat...Maddie has purple feet and a purple head that is clashing with her GIGANTIC pink bow.

(I wore a sweater at work all day because it is so cold in the building.)

Normally I would not say anything to a guest like this...but when you talk to me like a dog I bark back with harsh words.

If you are wondering what towels she bought, she got some white promotional towels that are crap. (Sorry, ALL SALES FINAL!) She got the white because she didn't want any dyes to irritate Maddie. BUT..she also bought a cinderella mutli colored dye infested towel wrap that has a "PRECIOUS!!!" princess crown on the head. Makes no sense.

The mom of the new mom actually thanked me on her way out for what I said. She said her daughter (the 20 something) threw a tantrum in the car on the way over because she did not want a blanket on Maddie that would possibly squash the tutu. She said my comments embarrassed her daughter...which was a blessing...because the older mom knew if she said anything to her daughter she wouldnt get the chance to see her granddaughter for a few months.

It's just another day in hell.